Character Chess: 10 Character Lessons Through the Game of Chess
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Stalemate: Connections that don't WORK!

7/17/2009

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A stalemate is a term used to describe a position in chess where no one can win. It's the opposite of a win-win but it's not a lose-lose. It's worse. It leaves both people in limbo. It's very much like wasted time.

I have a habit of connecting people whom I believe have a need to meet eachother. I think most people do this. However, I recently went overboard with a friend, that everybody needs to meet. He's a consultant who makes a living from giving people powerful information to enhance their lives. He has changed mine. As a favor to me, he always graciously agreed to make a connection. He brought to my attention that none of the people I introduced to him took advantage of the resources he offered through the meeting. As a result, he felt used and under valued. And the people whom he met had no value for the information they recieved because they got it without paying for it. It was a stalemate, no winners.

So here's the lesson. We must understand two things. First, there is a difference between connecting people for mutual benefit and giving away someone else's resources. I am guilty of giving away a friend's time, knowledge and resources. For that I am greatly sorry. Secondly, people don't value what they don't pay for. We must make sure that the person we intend to help realizes their own need before we offer to meet it. It's like giving an answer before the question is asked. So, we must make sure that people appreciate the gifts we give for their own benefit.

Coach Hodge

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